La sange pour moi...

We have a jukebox in our house. It's really cool, and we have recently added a song to it, which I can't remember the name of but it is mainly in French. It sounds very much like the lyrics are 'La Sange Pour Moi'. (It isn't anything as silly as that though. Sadly.) Which, very roughly translated, means 'A monkey for me'. My French is very bad, as you can see. That amused me so much I didn't bother to check the actual meaning. I will have to go downstairs eventually, if only to replenish my glass of red wine, so I'll find out at some point.

This is all pointless digression and even if that is essentially the name AND the purpose of my blog, I'm even boring myself, so I'll move on. I am taking this rare opportunity to write as I have killed my computer for the sixth time since January. I am a menace to technology. I am thinking of buying a new laptop but I'm worried that it's me that's breaking them and not that they are flipping out of their own accord. That being the more obvious answer.

I've also done something to piss off this computer as well. And it doesn't even belong to me. It has frozen twice. In fact, I've been forbidden to use it owing to my tragic track record with anything with a plug. I'm in here under cover of darkness. I should be wearing a balaclava and a ninja outfit, but that would make me giggle and give the game away. This computer is an apple. I have trouble with applemac. Yes, I know all the stuff is there on the screen and you just drag all the icons about and they're really good for graphic design, but JESUS! What the hell is the control key for here? I have never found a use for it, yet still, I keep on pressing it and expecting stuff to happen. Why do they even have the 'apple' key? Just to make things difficult for PC users, that's why.

That said, I am complaining unjustly. My good friend Angus once sent me an email from Canada and every time she tried to put in an apostrophe she got one of those funny 'e's with an accent over it. I have never been more confused by an email in my life.

...and why don't I have all the rich text format stuff so I can make my writing different sizes and bold and stuff? LAME! I just don't do frugal. I don't want to go and try to change it in case I lose everything I've just written. It's happened twice in hotmail today. There's a button I keep pressing that means 'just wipe everything from the screen and replace it with a box with a smiley little face in it'. I don't know which bloody key it is, but I keep on pressing it and when I work out where it is I fully intend to pry it from the keyboard with a screwdriver.

Hmm. I'm sure all this griping is due to giving up my 2 a night smoking habit (and nail biting and fatty food. Gah!). Not a big thing, but it really doesn't aid my rage.