Could this be....THE BEST JOB EVER!!!...?

Two posts in a week! I know. Sheer insanity! ...and I am now humming 'High and Dry' by Radiohead. Cosmic balancing is very in right now. I've just got from the church where all the lovely boys were doing a little singing for a concert this evening. We have to sit there and try not to look as though bored to tears. I took a book as it is only the rehearsal. I'm very much enjoying 'The Maltese Falcon'. I saw the film for the first time the other day - shame on me, I know, but I just hadn't come across it before and it was showing at the NFT. Rather good actually. I was surprised by how closely the film sticks to the book. I shall be using the phrase 'Shoo her in, Darling, shoo her in' as much as humanly possible over the coming weeks.

I've been putting up a display in my classroom this week. Having been all 'yes, I'll be keeping this one simple: just putting stuff up, nothing complicated' I've ended up cutting out a massive and stupidly detailed map of Britain and Ireland. Seemed like a good idea at the time. Unfortunately, the holiday work at this time of the year is not the same as at Christmas, when you're stuck indoors all the time beavering away in the classroom, like some kind of troll. It's not done. All the wibbley bits around the West coast of Scotland are proving to be a bit of a bloody nightmare. Especially as I am wielding a pair of scissors that look like those old-fashioned shears for trimming the grass. Showing my age there. Yes. I am pre-strimmer. In fact, there was a terrifying moment when I was able to point out something similar to a computer we had owned when I was a small child. In the Science Museum! For shame. The boys were hysterical. "Look, Miss, it's even in a specially enclosed plastic box! Hermetically sealed! It'll dissolve on contact with the air...hahahahaha!' Bastards. How dare they use science to mock me?! The Science museum was excellent, actually. The highlight of the trip for me was in the gift shop where there was a man with THE BEST JOB EVER!!!

Clearly, all that THE BEST JOB EVER!!! involved was playing with all the cool science museum toys in full view of demanding children and their long suffering parents. When I first saw him he had this little plane thing that flew in a perfect circle, so that it flew back to your hand unerringly every time. He was young and smug about having THE BEST JOB EVER!!!, as well he might be. A group of people had gathered to watch him nonchalantly chucking this thing about. He then turned it up a notch and started to throw it in a vertical circle as well as horizontal. Whilst watching, I leaned over to one of the boys and said "Isn't it incredible, with all these people about, he hasn't hi...." at which exact moment the little plane flew in a perfect semi-circle straight into a lady's particularly curly hairdo. There was an audible 'poc!' as it whacked her in the head. At this moment I gave an involuntary shout of laughter and then had to retreat to the frozen space food area to have a thoroughly unprofessional fit of the giggles.

See? Playing with science-y toys, showing off in front of children, doing things your mother told you not to: throwing things in a crowded enclosed area, beaning tourists...

THE BEST JOB EVER!!!



In other news: Where's the point in the insert key? Does anyone ever use it? Obviously, I mean apart from pressing it by accident and then losing letters when you try and type something in previously written text. Besides, surely 'insert' key is a bit of a misnomer here? If you try and insert a letter, you lose another. It should be called the 'replace' key. Or the 'interfere' key. If only it were large enough for me to tippex the word 'shenanigans' on it...